Thursday, 25 October 2007

conditional friendships

I warmed to the JA over the last year or so when my friend David told me that he was happy with just being friends; that he respected the fact that I don't believe and have no intention of ever coming back. I have to admit to a little skepticism, because in our day we were not allowed any non-JA friends and there was an "either for us or against us" attitude to "worldly" people.

I had hoped that this friendship - (David is a mechanic and I like cars, so we can talk about neutral stuff) - was evidence that things have changed in the JA, but recent texts suggest that it is still hard for JA folk to have unconditional friendships. In effect he said that it is difficult for them to be with people who do not want to join them. The unconditionality has become something of a test; a gauge for me of the extent to which things have really changed.

Helping a young chap leave, even though he'd made it clear to them that I'd had no part in persuading him, and even though they'd assured me they didn't hold my part against me, won't have helped. But there seems to have been a definite cooling of the friendship. I think I am being quietly dumped.